The adventures of Hiki
by Aurorawhisperwind
Summary: The magnificent adventures of Hiki, the daughter of the master of the HitenMitsurugi ryu. Join her in her quest for true love!
1. Chapter 1

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Okay, so I decided to write another nasty Mary-sue parody. Hope you like it!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin or any of its characters.

**Warnings:** Standard warnings apply.

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Our incredible story begins during the last stages of the Tokugawa era. It begins in Kyoto, and begins in the home of the master of the Hiten-Mitsurugi Ryu, and begins, more precisely on a beautiful, sunny, blessed day.

For this was the day that _she_ was born. No baby in the history of the world was more beautiful than her. She was even more beautiful than her mother, a celestial nymph by the name Asdherathsedfathzxw. More powerful than her father, Hiko Seijuro. Yes, people, you could tell she was more powerful than him even if she was like a minute old. And her name, oh her name! Such a beautiful, marvelous, wonderful, creative, imaginative, amazing name had never been thought of before! Hiki. Forget that this is the most stupidly obvious name anybody can give Hiko's daughter. No, we will just bask in the happiness at this baby's birth.

But alas, the happiness is short-lived. Very short-lived. Three hours and forty seconds to be precise. We gasp in horror as Hiko gets _drunk_ and abandons his nymph and his daughter. Oh how horribly cruel! And we watch in sympathy as Hiki darling grows up to be an adorable five year old in another fifty eight seconds. Then she listens, grief struck as her mother laments her father's ditching. And then Asdherathsedfathzxw, predictably, whispers to the demon child,

"My darling, I feel it. My end is near."

They are magically transported into a beautiful valley.

"Oh mother! But why?" Hiki whimpers.

"There is a curse in our family…. We are destined to die at the hands of-"

Too late. Asdherathsedfathzxw's words are cut-off abruptly as a giant pink tank appeared out of the heavens and squished her flat.

"MOTHER! DON'T LEAVE ME!" Hiki screams as she tries to wake her mother.

Tears flood us as we watch this touching scene, strategic rain having suddenly started.

A long mourning scene and burial later, Hiki finally understands that she is under a curse that a pink tank shall crush her to death unless she finds her true love. Then why did her mother die? Wasn't Hiko her true love? No, it seems. He was just someone she slept with.

But Hiki has no time for that. She is too busy plotting her revenge against her oh-so-evil-but-oh-so-hot father. And there ends the first chapter of this magnificent tale.

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Very short, I know. But the introduction was small and… so what do you guys think? Any guesses on her true love? 


	2. Chapter 2

**Aurora Whisperwind:** Update!

**Disclaimer:** Hiki is mine, but if you want her to torture, I could lend her.

**Warnings:** standard.

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Three days of pointless mourning later, Hiki, who's now a beautiful 19 year old, sets off to avenge her mother. _By dismantling the tank?_-we wonder.

No.

To gasp kill! Hiko!

Hiko, the dumbass that he is, has meanwhile forgotten he had fathered a child, (it's hard to keep track of all the brats), and has taken in a red headed shrimp as his student.

Oopsie, we forgot to give an update of how she looks now. She has foot long goldenish reddish silverish blueish pinkish blackish orangish greenish violetish hair. Her eyes are the same, goldenish reddish silverish blueish pinkish blackish orangish greenish violetish in color. Her legs were the longest things on the planet, her teeth white and sparkling. Her build is slim, but muscular; her height petite, yet tall; her clothes formfitting, yet flowing; her skin milk-white, yet with an amazing tan.

Her boobs were HUGE.

(What, you thought the pattern above continued?)

Now of course, Hiki knows the Hiten-Mitsurugi-ryu. She's even more a master than her father. Saitoh mat her on the way thanks to a plot hole and taught her his Gatotsu. As well as numerous others. Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru, Ranma, Naraku, Yuki, Robin, the entire Getbackers cast, etc. etc….. (No girls, she's not into both way yet)

So now that we've established the fact that the whole universe fancies Hiki, and has given her their powers, let's move on. And thus Hiki manages to find her evil dad magically, despite the fact that even _Kenshin_ needed help to find the man in the Shishio arc. We will just forget about that as Hiki is so awesome. Or there were little signboards all around saying 'Way to Hiki's horrible yet hot dad'

And there she sees her dad with gasp a little red headed girl.

How fast he had moved on with his life and found a new love! Ignore the fact that he seemed to be trouncing his 'love' to the ground while yelling "baka deshi!" No, we will become just as brain dead as Hiki, and assume that the little girl is Hiko's new flame. Righteous indignation and anger flood through us as we remember the beautiful nymph Asdherathsedfathzxw. How soon he had forgotten about her! We must have revenge! For honour! For glory! For Hiki's happiness!

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Bah, no matter what I do, the chapters are so short! Next chappie, Hiki's horrifying encounter with her pervy daddy. 


End file.
